For over two years now my portrait has been hanging in the upstairs front hall of the humans' residence. I can only take their word for it as I have never been invited inside. They think highly enough of self to have had a likeness done but not enough to let me inspect it personally. Gives you a good idea of the double standard in place around here.
There has been talk of having Jack's portrait done as well and we thought it would all come to naught, as many of the woman's blatherings do. He is very taken with having his own stall, stall sign, blankets, red bucket and so on and he was keen on the idea of having his likeness hang beside mine. Little did we know that the woman had sent off a series of photos of Jack to a woman in Germany who does animal portraits. Herself had it framed and today brought it out for our inspection. Jack is so overwhelmed that he wants it to hang in his stall where he can check it on a regular basis. "Well", he said."well, well, well , well, well, well, well, well. I finally got him stopped on the seventy- fifth "well" by pointing out a stray piece of gruel on the floor that he had missed.
"Dang", he said, "mebbe I am near as ole as dirt, but I make a damn fine subjick for a likeness. Nex time I'll put in muh uppers and lowers." I assured him he looks perfectly fine without and he went off beaming and doing a little jig of sheer donkey delight. He says in his view that having one's portrait done is a sure sign the management, as he calls the woman, wants him to stay around.
While mine is a formal portrait, Jack's is more casual, and it suits his down-to-earth personality in every way. He doesn't look a day over fifteen and the woman told him he was like the human in "The Picture of Dorian Grey", who remained perennially youthful while his portrait, stored in the attic, continued to age. Now Jack wants to keep a close eye on it for any signs of subtle changes.