Monday, October 19, 2009

She Opens The Gate To Paradise

These mostly windy, rainy cold days of autumn take it's toll on a donkey's psyche. Jack says he feels just fine and advised me to stop "broodin and frettin". His theory is that for him the bucket is always half full and for me it's always half empty with a hole in the bottom. I told him that his unbridled optimism makes me worry even more because I know fate is lurking around the corner.

His tenet of unbridled optimism was proved at least temporarily sound two days ago when the woman strode down to the stinging wire and let us into the lush swaths of grass in the front paddock for the first time in months. She told us that's where she was headed and so we followed closely, Doc walking importantly at her side with her hand draped over his neck. When we got there she wrestled with one of the metal sticks that hold the wire. Meanwhile Doc and Molly began to gyrate on the spot, urging her to hurry up. When she finally got the dreaded wire down, Doc was so excited he jumped over it, clearing it by a good five feet. Molly followed closely but merely hopped over it. Jack and I stayed behind and waited until the wire was safely out of the way. Then we made our way carefully into the ankle deep carpet of plush green. We've only come up for air a couple of times since. Unfortunately, the grass does not renew itself after the first few frosts so we know the heady days of gorging are nearly done.

We're not the only ones enjoying the last days of autumn - Sally has welcomed the cooler weather by finally becoming so comfortable in her role of barn princess that she is allowing the woman to pick her up and pat her. She accompanies the woman and Penny on their walks down the farm lane and makes a point of climbing various trees, perching on branches and addressing the world in a small but confident voice. She has lost the perpetually worried look that she has worn since her arrival and is sleek and glossy. It's no secret that I am a great admirer and friend of cats and it does a donkey's soul good to see her so happy.

Lest you think I have weakened on the doom and gloom front, I'd just like to add that today the woman peered at me and said, "Sheaffer, we need to start thinking of a fun costume for your big birthday bash next spring." We all know perfectly well that the words "fun" and "costume' strike fear and dread into a respectable donkey's heart. Now I'm going to have nightmares all winter about appearing in public dressed as a figure of ridicule. If I weren't so terrified of shavings bags, I'd just put one over my head.


billie said...

I think that this year she will surprise you and let you pick your own costume, Sheaffer.

I'm so glad to hear you got to get some of that lush green grass!

robert5721 said...

The bag over the head is NOT a good idea, obviously brought on by a deep depression .. maybe a small toddy (ie two ounces of burbon, two ounces of jack daniels, two ounces of gin and two ounces of vodka) would help ease the nerves that you are obviously suffering from. Listen to Mr Jack there big guy, he obviously has a ahandle on the "Imorove your outlook" thingie !!
Just keep smiling, it makes the woman wonder what you have been up to,,,, he he he....
Mr Gale

Dougie Donk said...

Don't get too excited just yet, but I am currently investigating ways of getting you more suitable headgear than last year's indignity.

I will email you asap :)

Buddy said...

Hay Sheaffer - LUSH GRASS??? Oh I'm so jealous - could you cut some and mail it to me??

I have to comment on the Mr Dribbles picture - I'm think Doc is belting out a country western my woman done me wrong song!

Your fren,

ponymaid said...

Oh Billie, what a trusting soul thou art - she would never let me actually choose the raiment in which I am to be clad. No Mozart costume with silken hose and velvet jacket, no Roman toga, no striped trousers and coat with tails - oh no, it's going to be something clownlike or so cloyingly twee that I will have trouble keeping my carrots down...I beg your pardon - I grew a trifle bitter for just a moment. Of course there is the grass for now...If I eat enough, maybe I won't fit into any costumes...

Mr. Gale, I requested the martini you suggested and she laughed gratingly and offered me a sip of tea. Sadly, the woman is always suspicious of what I'm up to, whether I'm smiling or not.

Dougie, too late! I'm already over-excited! Headgear? Does it involve the MacSheaffer tartan? Will rush off to check my emails.

Buddy, you would love this green and tasty grass - how I wish I could air freight some to you. You're bang on with your assessment of the Doc photo - he loves country music - the louder the better. He assures me he does indeed have "friends in low places" and I see no reason to disbelieve him.

Buddy said...

Hay Sheaffer - I had a very EXCITING day and I have to tell you all about it.

First - mom comes home from work early - very exciting - she gave me a kiss on the nose and then a big truck arrived - it came through the gates and it had a crane thingy on it and a huge white bullet in the back. So the crane thingy lifts the bit white bullet we already had and moves it away and a new white bullet is placed on its site. Mom said its a new propane tank. So the guy tests it and everything and mom is flirting with him endlessly - she made me blush! So the new bullet is in place and he goes inside the house to connect everything to the new bullet and the cats get out - Molly (black kitty) runs outside and rolls in the poof dirt - she is now grey and gloriously happy. So then all the connections and everything are done and the truck lifts the old bullet and takes it away. Well all this excitement was so great that I had to take a nap. Just wanted to share with you that FINALLY I had an exciting day including trucks and big white bullets and a handsome man that mom is still talking about.

Your fren,

Bob Levasseur said...

Buddy, what an interesting communication from you! I would like to be able to take credit for the surprise delivery of the white bullet but alas I cannot. Your woman's behaviour sounds strangely reminiscent of Molly's when she meets the horse boys in the forest - was there any batting of eyelashes? No wonder you were exhausted. Keep us posted on any new developments...

Bob Levasseur said...

Buddy, I should explain, the male human has lent me his writing mcahine as mine is in hospital. Don't worry, I'm still dictating every word.

completecare said...

Hi Sheaffer,
Indeed, winter must be on its way. This morning we four donkeys were allowed into the winter field. There is not much grass so our human figured it was safe for us. Tomorrow the herd of five horses will join us. This will be the first time Molly and Marble will have been in with the horses. That is why we are having a day to show M & M where the fences etc are before the big fellows come lumbering in. Once in and settled, the hay feeders will be moved
in and we will be stuck in this field until spring.

At the beginning of October an elderly gentleman arrived. He is 33 years old and it was decided that my friend, Mark would stay with him as company as he is not spry enough to go out with the main herd. That means I won't be able to spend the winter visiting with Mark. I am disappointed but can understand why it was necessary. I'll keep you updated.

Your Fan,

Buddy said...

Hay Everyone and Sheaffer my fren, I finally could relax today after all the excitement yesterday. I know my excitement isn't what Sheaffer experiences - but since it never happens here - I had to share. OK - off for some dinner and a nice nap.


ponymaid said...

Willy, that place is utterly dependent on you. What with explaining the grazing protocols, minding seniors and guarding your women, you must be exhausted. I'm glad to hear that, like ourselves, you are finally being allowed to eat some real food. I hope you don't miss Mark's company too much - Doc suggests you have a "guys" night with him but I have no idea what that entails and cannot tell you what a "kegger" is.

Buddy, no wonder you're exhausted. That sort of pace is hard to sustain - please make sure you haven't developed a fever or the ague as a result. I recommend as many naps as possible.