Just when I had fallen into a state of despair - what with the attempted bath and the ongoing remarks about waistlines, who should appear from the Nation's Capital but my old friends, mother and daughter humans who have known me since I first was forced into servitude with Herself. The younger human is the only one to have ever sat upon my back, when she was age six, and she and I share this fond memory whenever we reunite.
They showered me with compliments, not water, and presented me with an entire container of Scotch mints. Of course, on Her orders, these must be doled out like Oliver Twist's gruel but nevertheless...They groomed me, gently cleansed my legs and ears of fly bites and even sang me a quiet song about having "A Heart of Glass". I was temporarily transported to heaven.
Best of all, the mother human took it upon herself to mend my battered fly covering. The fastening under the chin has never been long enough so it is constantly rubbed off on trees and then, I don't know how, the ears become chewed. The Woman says I am in fact the guilty party; I have no recollection of it. But I digress. The extraordinary visitor not only attached a longer chin strap but, using material scavenged from an old horse covering, she rebuilt the ear covers into works of art. It took her hours but she did it just for me. I look immensely dashing, if I do say so myself. Even the Woman says I look like a Highwayman.
Alas, the kind visitors are gone, leaving me with memories, mints and a mask. I hope they return soon.
12 comments:
Oh Sheaffer, friends are so important in this world. How nice of her to travel such a long way just to see you and gently take care of your needs. Perhaps the woman took notes and will be a little more tender from here on.
Sheaffer, so happy that you had such lovely, thoughtful visitors who are long-time friends! I am moved by the entire container of mints JUST FOR YOU! How like The Woman to abduct them and dole them out piecemeal. I know that you would be ever so careful not to eat too many all at once if she were only to allow you the freedom to do so. I am thinking The Woman might have a slight need to control things. Am I way off base with that? Perhaps some psychoanalysis is in order. Still, an entire, whole mint is better than MINT DUST!! We are anxiously awaiting tomorrow when the heat breaks and we only get into the mid-eighties!! Rafer and Redford were charging around like missiles today - I don't know how they can move so fast and with such force in the heat, but they do.
Denise - the Woman is incorrigible and unreformable. I must depend on the kindness of distant friends, I'm afraid.
billie - a control issue? If only it were limited to that! She also has trust issues - note that she will not leave me alone with a container of four hundred mints. Freud would have a field day with her - he would diagnose a new condition and call it "Herselfishness". I'm glad the two donkey lads at your end are enjoy the balmy weather. So bracing.
Hi Sheaffer,
Glad to hear that you had a good visit with your old friends. Friends are very precious and we should always treasure them.
We have brand new flymasks hanging in the barn but we never get to wear them. Our human says that "one among us' will remove and destroy all the masks within the hour. She is not very trusting. I would never do anything like that!!!!!
We have some friends coming to visit on Saturday and the human has been busy making a "donkey to do" list for them. Right now she has about ten things on the list with more being added daily. The visitors will be too exhausted to spend time with us. I'll give you a full report on Monday.
Your Fan,
Willy
Willy - why must they be so suspicious? And why do they always look at us with narrowed eyes? Speciesism, that's what it is. I hope your visitors come bearing gifts or at least some filler for that magic ball you have that dispenses treats...
Hi Sheaffer,
Our guests arrived right on time. The human handed them the "donkey TO DO list" and then completely ignored them for the rest of the morning. Rumour has it that the human and Our Girl Friday sat in the barn on lawnchairs with their feet up and gossiped!!!!
One good thing is that we had the visitors all to ourselves. Like your visitors from the Nation's Capital ours were also caring and gentle. We got a good grooming and lots of hugs and compliments on our perfect behaviour.
To show our appreciation we took the guests for a stroll along our
walking trail that fortunately ends at our hayfeeder. This is a good thing since we had to pospone breakfast because of the arrival of our guests. It was a wonderful morning and as the spokesperson for Lokie, Molly and Marble I made sure to let them know they were welcome to visit anytime.
Your fan,
Willy
I feel deprived! My woman brings little people as visitors and they make alarming high-ptched noises about "isn't he CUUUTE????"
Even with the offfer of Polo mints, I feel the need to preserve my dignity and retreat to a safe distance.I admire your trust in letting strangers touch you. Perhaps I will allow this one day, but not just yet - I have a reputation to maintain.
Willy - you are a most excellent host. But honestly, isn't it typical that your humans were lolling about while the guests toiled? This all sounds horribly familiar.
Dougie - this human offspring is an exception. She has been trained since infancy to respect my every wish and execute my every command. I,too,would beat a heaty retreat if someone were to squeal in a porcine manner in my sensitive hearing apparatus. You did very well to remove yourself.
Hi Sheaffer,
I was involved in an unfortunate incident last night. Here is my side of the story although the humans might have a different version.
We had more visitors - our new next door neighbours. They came to meet everyone at The Roost. Of course, they started with us as we all know Donkeys Rule!!!! First of all they admired me and thought I was truly wonderful. After visiting with me for awhile they moved on to spend time with the other donkeys. I was just relaxing and felt the need for a large, contented yawn. As my teeth closed they accidently came into contact with the male visitor's "butt cheek" - not my fault. Our human used that term because young Loki is at an impressionable age and doesn't need to hear inappropriate terms. I was most distressed that this accident happened but our human said not to worry - our new neighbour would gets lots of attention in the locker room because of it. Humans have a strange sense of humour. If I only knew what a locker room was I might have understood the joke.
Next time I will turn my head to one side when I need to yawn.
That's my story and I am sticking to it.
Your Fan,
Willy
Willy - as our American friends say "lawyer up, lawyer up!". Unless someone caught it on film, they can prove nothing. Stick to your guns, my boy, a donkey has every right to yawn. That man can consider himself lucky to be branded with donkey dentition.
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