I May Be An Addict!

It happened like this, casually, without thought, as so many of these situations do. Let this be a warning to others.

I was halfway through my meagre dinner portion when the woman leaned into my room and tipped a small bag of unindentified white powder into my bowl. I suppose I shouldn't have been too surprised as she is given to bizarre actions that make no sense. Of course MY natural reaction was to snort loudly while attempting to identify said powder. The result was a that a toxic cloud enveloped us and a good portion of the stuff was drawn directly into my sinus cavities. Too late, I realized she must have snuck a vast quantity of cocaine into my food! Why, I could not say, nor could I imagine where she would have acquired such an amount of the stuff.

I retreated to the far corner of my room, snorting and hacking, in an effort to rid myself of the white peril. I could feel the effects on my brain almost immediately. I felt curiously exhilarated and buoyed up and the more I thought about it the more I quite liked the experience. Just like that, I had been launched on the road to perdition. Of course, Herself found it all highly amusing. Those people do, once they have you hooked.

She accused me of being overly dramatic and even pursued me with the bowl, invitating me to take just the tiniest of tastes as she was sure I would like it. And heaven help me, I eventually did just that. It tasted...well, strangely minty. Not at all what I expected but most pleasant. Obviously I was a prime candidate for addiction. And that's when she explained that it was the residue from the bottom of the bag of English mints.

Honestly, you think she might have mentioned the mint element before putting me through all that. But no. She simply cackled in a most unbecoming manner and called me "overly dramatic". Pshaw. Just another typical day at the madhouse. Now I must work on restoring my sinuses to normal operating condition.