Friday, March 7, 2008

Signs of Spring

We're engulfed in what the weather gurus are calling "the storm of the season" but there are signs that sometime, eventually, spring may sidle into the picture. There is now enough light for a donkey to see his own feet at almost 7pm.

One sure sign is the return of the shiny black birds with red epaulets on their wings. They suddenly appeared in our trees on Tuesday and immediately began a pitched and noisy battle over territory. There's much avian profanity and posturing and then they all stop and groom their feathers until it starts over again. TJ is planning to kill them all.

Another sign is that the cat actually sets paw outside the house and, shaking the dampness from her feet with each step, she condescends to pay us a visit. She informs us regularly that she is not just a garden variety cat but a Russian Blue, and as such must be treated as royalty. We are not allowed to mention that she came to us through a rescue place. I think she may be part monkey because she is built very much on the length and swings around casually in the trees like a small grey ape. She's very haughty and addresses us as "You serfs". Her response to anything that annoys her is "Pffffttt". TJ is planning to kill her.

The black and white cat-sized creature with the gas cannisters on his hind end is beginning to stir. We stay clear of him because the dog bowled him over when she first arrived and for days afterwards the stench was incredible. She had to sleep in the horse trailer overnight. He's a very strange character, giving to absentmindedly digging small holes while mumbling to himself. Even the owl ignores him. TJ is planning to kill him.

Tonight the idiot mule charged up behind me so fast that his head and shoulders got wedged between my hind legs and he lifted me clear off the ground. I was propelled forward at high speed while he tried to figure out how to extricate himself. Of course it didn't occur to him to stop and backup. He finally ran me up a snow bank, dislodging himself with a violent crash. The woman laughed and said "Are you two playing wheelbarrow?" She really is quite thick. I suspect it was another form of the atomic wedgie she mentioned.


Gale said...

Wishing TJ good luck in catching the birds...fat chance! I believe Miss Violet could inflict some damage with those paws if TJ's not careful.

If you really want to get even for the wheelbarrow wedgie trick (how rude of him!), I think your best bet is to make friends with the polecat, then sit back and wait; but then YOU and the others will have to live with the results, so it may not be worth it.

Wow on the blizzard pictures! It is very difficult to look at photos of TJ and not think cute, cute, cute -- but one can also see the potential for some evil doings there.

ponymaid said...

I have thought over your plan, gale,and I am willing to suffer the olfactory consequences of TJ assaulting the polecat creature. I will be sure to stand upwind.

I must concede that TJ is rather alarmingly cute, but always remember that the devil hides himself in many guises...the more snowed-in we become, the more devilish he becomes. Sigh.

Uncle Ed said...

I think you jinxed us by saying that spring is around the corner. The snow we got last night is up to a donkeys ear tips out here.

Uncle Ed

ponymaid said...

Alas, Uncle Ed, you may be right. Apparantly this storm covered one third of North America and I caused it by merely mentioning spring. As our neighbour says "Mother Nature'll come right up and pull a knife on ya". This time it was an unusually large knife. Mea Culpa.

robert5721 said...

Shaeffer, TJ really is beginning to sound like he will,be VERRY useful once you take office....remember the French Foreign Legion thing? Very useful for dirty jobs that you do not want to be a party to (ie get caught for) but need to have done. Just have the good DOC continue to toughen him up till you take office!
Mr Gale
Advisor, Donkey Party

ponymaid said...

Mr. Gale, you're absolutely right. TJ is very much an anarchist movement/SWAT team/roller derby all in one body. He needs a broader canvas on which to wreak his creative terror. If the media would just start reporting on my great political success to date, TJ's enforcer role would come into play. Or maybe I should just unleash him on the media...