Wednesday, July 16, 2008

Mysterious Masked Donkey

Sometime back in the spring the woman ordered a fly mask with ears for me. It finally arrived this week. She says it took them that long to find enough material for the ear portion but I rather think that is just her unrefined sense of humour at work. The ears are somewhat long and tend to flop over at the ends but they most definitely keep the pestilent hordes from setting up a cafeteria in my finely tuned hearing apparatus. In fly season all I hear is a constant buzzing. Jack now has one on order in a slightly larger size. When the woman first put it on me she stood back and barely stifled a hearty laugh, unsuccessfully turning it into a phony cough at the last minute. "Sheaffer", she said, "you look like a donkey super-hero". That's more like it, I thought. Then she ruined it by adding "or a badly disguised donkey bank robber". Pahhh.

Now that the extreme heat is here we are allowed into the lush part of the paddock more often but that means we have to gallop back to the run-in when the fly hordes descend. Actually the others gallop but I proceed at a stately trot, looking, the woman rudely says, like the Queen Elizabeth 2 steaming into port. There is far too much haste in these modern times, in my opinion. Jack can put on an impressive turn of speed for someone of his age and he always beats me to the run-in by a wide margin. "Young man", he said, "you are in no danger of depletin that store of calories yev got put by." I should think not - I've been storing these calories for years.

We have one defense against the bugs and that is repeated, vigorous dust bathing. We donkeys are experts in this field and can spend ages in our dust baths, cleverly working the material through our coats in a series of complicated rolling procedures. When done, we lie there for awhile to let the dust settle and then get to our feet slowly to ensure thorough covereage and minimum dust loss. The key, however, which the horses just can't comprehend, is to never, ever shake. That ruins the whole therapeutic effect. It also means that when the woman grooms us in the evening, she herself emerges looking like a grumbling grey ghost, which we very much enjoy.


robert5721 said...

Sheaffer !! In competition with John Wesley Harding EH? Bank robbers are WAY COOL there bud, and are my decided HEROES for sure. I love the analogy....(That Prozac must be working a good balsam tree and rub all over it for protection from the black flies (am familiar with em from logging near Montreal in that French area..ugh..)besides, it makes a REAL mess for the woman when grooming time comes..stuff is real sticky, kinda like Molly's goo job.
You guys hang in there..
Mr Gale

billie said...

I'm looking for one of those for Rafer Johnson - you look very spiffy.

He has an earless and it looks very cute, but those ears need some protection. :)

Buddy said...

I will not wear a fly mask with ears or anything on the top of my head - nope will not do it - my fly mask has a little strap behind my ears and thats it - anymore and it is off my head and full of poop - yep - mom bought me a real fancy one last year and I took it off and pooped in it - twice! So no more with ears and all that material.

You look stylin Sheaffer!!!

ponymaid said...

Mr. Gale, we've sent the woman out hunting for a balsam tree - she may not be back for awhile, hehhehheh...

billie, mine is made especially for distinguished by Cashel - they are very generous with the ear compartments.

buddy - you realize that now Molly is nearly delerious with love - a tall blond surfer who defies the establishment by using his headgear as a toilet facility - it just doesn't get better than that for someone like our Molly.

Buddy said...

Molly is just the perfect mate for me - she gets me!!