Wednesday, May 14, 2008

I'm Dreaming of a TJ Shaped Speed Bump

Yesterday bright and early some quite noisy and interesting equipment rolled down our driveway and began attacking it. A scraping machine scalped the top layer and the scrapings were taken away by a hyper-active machine with a large bucket on the front. Then the most wonderful black and grey mixture of rocks and chopped up old pavement arrived in big trucks. A giant roller device then squashed it all into place. How I dream of a TJ size mogul on the new driveway after the roller accidently flattens him. He'd make an excellent speed bump. I strongly encouraged him to squeeze through the fence and cavort in front of the machine but as soon as I suggest anything, he becomes even more mule-ish and simply refuses.

The woman stared at us very hard yesterday and declared we were becoming blimp-like and bloated with the new grass and then she put up what TJ calls the "stinging wire". We can see the lush two acres at the front of the paddock but can only stare and look longingly. We wait months for this time of year and of course she has to somehow contrive to limit our enjoyment - or what she calls unbridled consumerism. It's still better than having to wear that damnable muzzle contraption.

She and Molly are back to their forest tours and even go in a pond and splash around - complete insanity to a donkey who loathes large bodies of water. They returned smug, sweaty and bug bitten. Doc managed to shriek and bellow the whole time they were gone, which much impressed the driveway builders. Even TJ, who has remained silent all these months, let out an ungodly "groonk" noise on their return. It makes him even more repulsive.


OzArab said...

Sounds like a busy time over there! I wish we had some green grass. I'm most jealous! (One could even say *green with envy*)
Maybe you should try some reverse psychology with TJ? Or suggest that there are free carrots on the driveway and he had better grab them before the machine does..... ;) hehe

robert5721 said...

your good taste and manners are remarkable. It is too bad that much of this will not rub off on your buddies. A simple raised eyebrow is sufficient to indicate pleasure at seeing them back alive, or otherwise, depending. Sounds like some of this chicanery could come back in the otherwise department. You should write a book on equine manners, but alas, i fear that TJ can not read anyway. You could make some money on it! LOL.
Mr Gale

ponymaid said...

ozarab, I wish I'd thought of that clever plan of action. Free carrots - set in front of a moving roller. I was certainly asleep at the switch on that one. I will see what I can do with the combine later in the season. Or perhaps the potato harvester - TJ would fit right in with the Yukon Golds.

Mr. Gale, good manners are completely lost on this crowd of rowdies and hooligans. My life's dream is to write a book of equine etiquette but TJ would almost certainly consume his copy after crayoning rude things in the margins.