Wednesday, April 2, 2008


You may have noticed some odd icons in boxes at the top of my blog. The woman is trying to figure out if more than a handful of people and donkeys are reading my blog. She's a bit slow and just discovered how to put an abacus like counting device on here. There are also some places you can go to let me know if my daily musings are of interest - I hope they are, I put in such busy days it makes my head spin.

My correspondents Fred and Ginger have told me about a shocking pseudo-sporting event where large humans climb on top of donkeys and try to throw a ball though an elevated basket contraption. The donkeys hate it and the audience laughs and mocks their dignified attempts to comply. First they steal our image for some unknown political party and now they mock us for our inablility to play a childish game. Anyone who knows donkeys knows the only organized game we enjoy is croquet. It has has a wonderfully slow pace and the playing field provides built-in snacking. A player can doze quietly in the sun while listening to the gentle click of wooden mallet on wooden sphere. These can also provide a snacking opportunity, though the surface is shockingly hard for whittling.

Our muck and mire has started to dry out, the cat came into the paddock and told us all off, and various birds are ransacking every inch of the property for building material. Molly's sheddings could provide housing for a few million avian friends, though I can't imagine what their houses would smell like when they got wet.


Anonymous said...

Greetings from a lurker!!! Well since the women is getting sneaky with technology & trying to figure out just how popular you really are! I thought Id come out of the woodwork... & finally speak up!!

As now & then i have to get my dose of whats going on in the world of Sheaffer.

As I have only met you once in person.... which you were ever so kind to show me around your wonderful land in your grand buggy! But alas it was in the days of the elegant bay mare, Mya, that made it all occur. Which also made MY human have a ride of a life time.. boy did she have some fancy foot work with those back legs that day!

Anyways thought Id Say Hi & have fun in the mud!

A Bratty Chestnut
Colour Within AKA INDY

completecare said...

Hi Sheaffer,
You can tell your human that there are a great many readers of your blog. Many check several times a day just to see if anything new has been added. My human has passed on your info to many people and although most don't add comments lots enjoy reading of your adventures. Your trials and tribulations are always a topic for discussion on Sunday mornings when Uncle Ed and his Winsome Wife Wendy come to the barn to visit their horse Dakota. If the truth be know I am sure if they were buying a new equine now they would be checking out the donkey market!!!!!

Your fan,

ponymaid said...

Indy, my jumping bean friend! I hope you made a course out of all those snow banks. The beautiful Mya is now jumping over obstacles to her heart's content - for some reason our woman doesn't like being airborne. Are donkeys allowed at horse shows as spectators? If so I will come and see you in action.

Willy and Bert, good to hear from you. I hope Uncle Ed is still hard at work on my campaign. That Obama person looks to be virtually unbeatable, but I still think I could bowl better and I don't even have hands. I know I could beat him at croquet any day.

the7msn said...

Hey, Sheaffer! Our woman has been reading us your stories for quite awhile. We love 'em! She says she first heard you had a blog when she was visiting teamdonk and she's really glad she found you. Keep up the good work.
Your pals over at the 7MSN Ranch,
George and Alan

RussianRoulette said...

Sheaffer, I have been a lurker since about December and I have certainly enjoyed reading your blog. :) I've even passed it on to a couple of friends.

Thank you for keeping me entertained. I have always had a fascination for donkies and you've been fulfilling my desire for a donkey while I cannot have one.

petersdr said...

Sheaffer -

I am a recent lurker but have become addicted. My two-legged hairless feeder reads your blogs to me to let me know how lucky I am that I don't live with any mule-monsters. I almost think I'd like a piece of one, but I doubt I'll ever get the chance - I am surrounded by horses much bigger than me, but they don't know it...

Finn the Wonder Pony said...

Goodness, Sheaffer, I think you are rather famous... I first read about you on a list of varied equines who all drive. We have horses, ponies, donkeys and, yes, even mules. (All mules are not evil; there is a famous Mammoth Mule named John Henry who could probably pound, I mean talk, some manners into little TJ.) I adore reading your blogs; you have such a wonderful turn of phrase. Tell your woman there would be many disappointed fans if she were to cut you off! I believe that you should consider publishing a book. I know, it will have to wait 8 years until your presidency is done, but you can actually work on it while you are in the White House... after all, the current resident seems to find lots of time for vacations...
Spring is soon to arrive here as well; much bird activity, mice for the barn puma to catch, and I am trying to provide every creature on the planet with enough white insulation/building material that the forests should be quite safe for awhile.
Love you,

Anonymous said...

Thwarted Joy Ride
Humans can never get it right. This morning, just as the sun was rising over the Elfwood, Fred and I ventured out the back door of the barn. The Fat Lady had left it open, confident that four feet of snow would stymie any escape plans. For the last month, Fred and I have generally accepted that to be true. We have almost drowned on several occasions and only use the back of the barn as a launch pad for our death-defying gallops from the manure pile through the barn and out into the front barnyard.

You can imagine our surprise when we discovered this morning that we can walk on snow. So we walked right out of the barnyard, down the alleyway between the paddocks and out into a big field. All the gates had conveniently been left open. Indeed, they were frozen to the ground. Fred and I took a leisurely tour around the perimeter. The field is an enormous three acres – quite an expanse when you are only three feet tall. We took care to taste a few fence posts, shrubs and trees. Our favourite was Norway spruce – an excellent and embracing antidote to the winter blahs.

Unknown to us, the Fat Lady had spotted us from her slothful bed – where she was reclining, drinking cardamom black tea and eating Tangelo and fresh pineapple pieces. Within a minute she charged out of the house wearing a comical array of down-filled winter wear and night clothes and calling Donkeeey – Donkeeey at the top of her screechy voice. We pretended to come, then galloped away towards a broken board in the fence – happily pounding over the frozen whiteness – such fun after a winter of incarceration.

Unfortunately, within 20 minutes, she had engaged the assistance of the Big Guy and we had been lured with hay and carrots to the gate. We kicked up our heels and ran back to the barnyard, making sure that once they had puffed into view, we made ready to turn about and run back. Unfortunately, Fred is not so quick off the mark. They put a silly pink halter with dancing ponies on him faster than you can say “knife” and Fred was taught how to lead – took about 2 minutes and half a carrot. Next thing you know we were in the barnyard again.

What a disappointment. I would have held out for at least one carrot. I don’t know how Fred can be sooo smart and sooo stupid.

The Fat Lady has given us a sacrificial spruce tree to munch on while we contemplate our next move. We hope – ultimately – to emulate your renowned run down the Aurora Side Road to Hanson’s Market. However, Elfwood Farm is on a dirt road, off a dirt road so we will have to go some way to get to the white line on the highway. And with Fred in tow, there is no knowing what distractions may detain us from our objective.

Jenn said...

Another lurker here enjoying Shaeffer's musings as often as the woman gets around to posting them.

Our feeder shares Shaeffer's stories with us and we listen with wide-eyed delight. We've never seen a donkey, or a mule, and are quite fascinated with such creatures.

Today we will cover ourselves in sticky, gloppy mud just so the feeder will have to groom us...again.

Chief the Mighty Appy and Calypso the Sneaky Mare